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Raising Concerns With Staff Is Difficult, But It’s Worse Still When They Don’t See The Problem

A tough conversation is made even harder when the two sides don't even agree on the issue, so here's how to manage that meeting

Sonia Gill
by Sonia Gill
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You’ve told them several times. Others have even tried to get the point across. But somehow this person still doesn’t understand there’s a problem.

This is exactly the issue one of the SLTs I support had. They had a teacher, who we’ll call Del, whose quality of teaching and learning they believed required improvement, but which he thought was good or better.

Various members of the SLT had tried everything you could think of. In a feedback meeting, one of them was again attempting to get him to understand why his marking wasn’t up to standard. But Del wasn’t getting it. He insisted it was good – even when they looked at the marking in his books together.

Not only is this frustrating for both sides, but acknowledging an issue’s existence is the first step to solving it. So until Del did, he wasn’t going to take the action needed for him to improve. Worst-case scenario, he could end up in capability without understanding how or why.

In many ways it sounds crazy, but it’s easy enough for someone to be in this unfortunate position: it might be a defence mechanism, or it may be as simple as them really not seeing the problem.

Often, however, I find that it’s us who are the problem: we think we’ve stated the issue clearly, but so many times we actually haven’t. And if we’re not communicating clearly, how can the other person understand a message they probably don’t want to hear in the first place?

For every time I’ve seen this happen, the senior leader will tell me they have unequivocally told the other person, very clearly, 100 per cent. But actually, they just think they have. Their words have unintentionally let them down, and not through lack of care or intelligence, it’s just a tough problem to crack.

So, what did we do with Del? First, I helped the team prepare for the meeting. Only a few people would be present, but since they had all tried to get the message across at some point, everyone’s experience was useful.

Usually I advocate having one opening sentence prepared for difficult conversations, but in this instance it was about six! This is not ideal, but was necessary if we were to get the message across. So, to establish common ground early on, we used a technique called ‘Get a yes’, which works like this:

You: Del, we’ve been talking about your performance since September. Would you agree?

Del: Yes (or something similar will do, even a nod).

You: And there seems to be a discrepancy between how you and the SLT perceive your performance: you think your teaching is good and the SLT think your teaching is inadequate. Would you agree?

Del: Yes.

You: And we have put in place action plans and support to improve your teaching to the SLT’s expectations of good. Would you agree?

Del: Yes.

There’s no guarantee that Del will say ‘yes’ every time, but there is a good chance that he will, which means we start in agreement, instead of being at odds.

However you get there, with a conversation like this really you’re taking someone from almost an ‘ignorance is bliss’ state to a harsh realisation, and this is never nice. However, it’s so important because it would be far worse for them to find themselves in capability or losing their job.

And how did it go? Well, it worked. Del took the message on board this time; he was down, worried and scared. Of course, I don’t want anyone to have these emotions and neither did the senior leaders. But the fact he realised how serious this was meant the SLT had a better chance of working with him to improve, so that he could be secure in his teaching practise and job.

As difficult as it was to finally get him to understand the issue, had it failed it would only have meant another far-worse conversation in the near future.

Sonia Gill is founder of Heads Up, specialising in supporting headteachers and school leaders create an outstanding school culture. To receive helpful tips and videos visit ukheadsup.com.

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