12 Signs that you are, Biologically, a Primary Teacher
Eye rolls at talk of your lengthy 'holidays', glee at the sight of new glue sticks, and other signs from Jonny Walker that you are a primary teacher through and through…
- by Jonny Walker
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Paddington Bear – Whole-school lesson plans & activity sheets
2 | Our eyebrows have the same expressive versatility as a prima ballerina
3 | We can recognise a pupil from 1km away based on the design of their coat
4 | Our evolutionary ‘fight or flight’ reflex is triggered as soon as a visiting theatre group request teacher volunteers
5 | Our collective pancreas converts staff room cake into pedagogical glee
6 | When the word ‘Miss’ is shouted, anywhere, we spring to high alertness (even the male teachers among us)
7 | Our habitual caffeine intake keeps us afloat, despite being sufficient to kill most other mammals
8 | We psychologically ready ourselves for sports day for the other 364 days of the year
9 | Our ability to isolate midnight contraband on residential visits is found only in primary teachers and police sniffer dogs
10 | By the end of term, our eye bags have eye bags of their own
11 | We are instinctively geared to produce ‘eyerolls’ as soon as a non-teacher begins talking about the length of our holidays
12 | The sight of a misplaced apostrophe feels like we are being punched in the throat
1 | Our endorphin levels rival those of champion athletes at the sight of a fresh box of glue sticks
2 | Our eyebrows have the same expressive versatility as a prima ballerina
3 | We can recognise a pupil from 1km away based on the design of their coat
4 | Our evolutionary ‘fight or flight’ reflex is triggered as soon as a visiting theatre group request teacher volunteers
5 | Our collective pancreas converts staff room cake into pedagogical glee
6 | When the word ‘Miss’ is shouted, anywhere, we spring to high alertness (even the male teachers among us)
7 | Our habitual caffeine intake keeps us afloat, despite being sufficient to kill most other mammals
8 | We psychologically ready ourselves for sports day for the other 364 days of the year
9 | Our ability to isolate midnight contraband on residential visits is found only in primary teachers and police sniffer dogs
10 | By the end of term, our eye bags have eye bags of their own
11 | We are instinctively geared to produce ‘eyerolls’ as soon as a non-teacher begins talking about the length of our holidays
12 | The sight of a misplaced apostrophe feels like we are being punched in the throat
